The main side effects this round have been intense fatigue mixed with bone aches. Fatigue is a strange thing. It's like the world is in slow motion yet I still can't keep up. On my daily walks, I've all of a sudden landed in the back of the group (Jon, 2 dogs and me). Usually I'm the one to run ahead and provoke the dogs for a game of catch up. This week they've all been looking behind their shoulders to see an out-of-breath me trailing behind at snails-pace! I eat slower, talk slower, breath slower, reach slower... it's a very odd feeling when you're used to moving 100 mph. I even talk softer which I didn't realize until the man in the check-out line aggressively asked me to repeat myself and I almost started to cry at his rudeness. Talking takes energy, doesn't anyone realize this!?!? And what's with the tears? When did I get so sensitive?!?!
Besides the fatigue, the bone aches have probably been around 1/2 to 3/4 the intensity they were the last round. One precaution I took this time was heading back to my Oncologist the day after chemo to get an 1.5 hour IV infusion of saline to hydrate my body. Surprisingly the nurse said my veins were already dehydrated which shocked me considering I was drinking water like a fish. Other than that, I have similar ailments as the last time such as flat taste buds, upset stomach, headaches, dry skin, sensitive mouth, emotional breakdowns, etc.
My hair loss continues. It's taken some time to get used to, but it's much easier now that it's shaved to a #1. I sleep with a nightcap on to keep the warmth, but always wake up to a pool of little splinters of black hair. At first my head looked like a cheetah, now it looks like a peach on the top with cheetah patches on the back. It's been interesting to unveil parts of my virgin scalp, finding little freckles in places I never knew I had! The wigs are always fun to play with (big thanks to my Publicity colleagues who sent over 2 new amazing shades, one being purple - the color I've been looking to buy). But I have started to enjoy the freedom of a bald head or simple scarf at home, I even had the courage to walk the dogs a few times with only a scarf on. When I do this I am very attentive to other peoples glances, trying to evaluate if they see a sick person or a normal woman walking past them. I know this insecurity will eventually fade, but it has taken a bit of courage to get used to. After all, it's all face now... I don't have the hair to hide underneath! But I highly doubt I'll be going to work or to a ball game without the security of a wig.
All said, last night I celebrated a new me. As I was walking around bald and glowing, I realized how free and invigorated I felt. It's been refreshing to know that the chemo is working and that anything "fast growing" is getting killed (and replaced if it's non-cancerous). No facial, body scrub, fast or diet could cleanse my body as good as chemo is doing, and it's an exhilarating feeling that I welcome. I'm like a lizard, shedding my old skin and getting ready to unveil a new silky smooth me!
P.S. I don't want to forget another shout out of gratitude for the new Instagram photos posted. The shot on Jurassic Park is of my Marketing colleagues who decked out in IWBF shirts, walked through Universal Studios Theme Park in support of me, and took a scary plunge down the ride. It's an amazing photo, I'm still trying to figure out if they actually carried the sign or photoshopped it in!
My hair loss continues. It's taken some time to get used to, but it's much easier now that it's shaved to a #1. I sleep with a nightcap on to keep the warmth, but always wake up to a pool of little splinters of black hair. At first my head looked like a cheetah, now it looks like a peach on the top with cheetah patches on the back. It's been interesting to unveil parts of my virgin scalp, finding little freckles in places I never knew I had! The wigs are always fun to play with (big thanks to my Publicity colleagues who sent over 2 new amazing shades, one being purple - the color I've been looking to buy). But I have started to enjoy the freedom of a bald head or simple scarf at home, I even had the courage to walk the dogs a few times with only a scarf on. When I do this I am very attentive to other peoples glances, trying to evaluate if they see a sick person or a normal woman walking past them. I know this insecurity will eventually fade, but it has taken a bit of courage to get used to. After all, it's all face now... I don't have the hair to hide underneath! But I highly doubt I'll be going to work or to a ball game without the security of a wig.
All said, last night I celebrated a new me. As I was walking around bald and glowing, I realized how free and invigorated I felt. It's been refreshing to know that the chemo is working and that anything "fast growing" is getting killed (and replaced if it's non-cancerous). No facial, body scrub, fast or diet could cleanse my body as good as chemo is doing, and it's an exhilarating feeling that I welcome. I'm like a lizard, shedding my old skin and getting ready to unveil a new silky smooth me!
P.S. I don't want to forget another shout out of gratitude for the new Instagram photos posted. The shot on Jurassic Park is of my Marketing colleagues who decked out in IWBF shirts, walked through Universal Studios Theme Park in support of me, and took a scary plunge down the ride. It's an amazing photo, I'm still trying to figure out if they actually carried the sign or photoshopped it in!
So glad you are doing well- been thinking of you-
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