It's all cumulative

I'm beginning to better understand the meaning of "cumulative effects" first hand. This third round of chemo side effects has not only been hard, it's been different. I guess the one thing you hope when undergoing your first chemo is to learn how your body reacts so you can prepare your mind and body for the next round. Perhaps the hardest part of my treatments is that I seem to have different side effects every time.

This round has been harder than the last. The fatigue and body aches are similar, but unfortunately they were accompanied by intense heart burn and nausea. This weekend was a blur... another one of those weekends where I don't leave the comfort of my king bed and down comforter. The heart burn was so intense and it flared up every 30 seconds. I think that contributed to my overall queasiness, which of course lead to other unfortunate things. When I finally made it out of bed on Sunday night I realized I had a rash all over my body. Apparently I'm having an allergic reaction to the Taxotere (one of the drugs I get during the infusion). Being a rather allergy prone person (nuts, legumes, crustaceans and more), I'm staying calm and popping Benedryl's when it becomes unbearable. Rashes and itchiness are certainly annoying, but I think I've built a certain tolerance to allergy attacks given my history. Next time my doctor may try to increase the steroid dosage to address the allergies, although the steroids come with their own list of side effects. It's crazy to realize how many drugs you layer on top of each other to fight side effects of other drugs. It's like a constant battle of which side effect is worse and what are you willing to tolerate?

All that said, I can certainly see through the fog to appreciate that I'm almost done with the infusions. And I am so grateful that I am able to rest and focus on feeling better while the earth continues to revolve, movies continue to get marketed and the south bay sunshine teases me into looking forward to a bikini filled summer with my new boobs!

I close this post with a outpouring of love to those in Boston who have been affected by the bombings yesterday. It saddens me so much to see something like this, and it puts into perspective the importance of living each day to it's fullest and appreciating the things we have. Life's short, let's not take for granted the moments we have on this earth.

Here's a video that always puts a smile on my face, hopefully it will put one on yours! I find watching it before my chemo infusions always helps me feel a little "stronger"!